Life Intelligence

Life Intelligence

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Life Intelligence
Why most relationships don't last
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Why most relationships don't last

Can you change the odds?

Valentina Petrova's avatar
Valentina Petrova
Oct 26, 2023
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Why most relationships don't last
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Without Life Intelligence, Wednesdays are just hump days (and not the good kind).
You’re welcome.

I mused about whether romantic relationships live up to the promised benefits in THIS post a few weeks ago. Statistically, if someone proposed a business idea with the same odds of success as a marriage, very few people would bet their time and savings on it. Not all relationships lead to a wedding, and some studies suggest that the average length of a romantic relationship is around 2.5 to 3 years. This literally means that long-term, happy relationships hardly exist. You notice, I hope, that I snuck in the word "happy" in the previous sentence.

First, it's OK that most relationships don't last. People shop around for partners like they shop around for shoes – trying them on to decide if they are a good fit. Nothing wrong with that. It's a free country in the 21st century. The last thing anyone wants is a painful blister. Or someone who'll drink our savings, molest the kids, or smell bed in the morning. We all have ideas of what we want and what we cannot stand. Some of these ideas come from experiences we prefer not to repeat.

But why do we still end up miserable when we finally find someone we fall in love with, make plans, and imagine a future together? Married or not, we eventually eye the door and often run for it. Relationships look more like an obstacle course than a "happily ever after." People trip over themselves constantly, trying to reconcile reality vs. social media style relationship expectations.

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